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Dear New Mother
You Are Enough. Yes You Are Enough.
There will be times when you wonder how the Universe could have chosen you to raise this unique complex little bundle. When you struggle to feed him.
When you worry about how to best put her to sleep. When you can’t soothe his crying or take away this tiny little person’s terrible tummy pains.
You Are Enough. Just your presence. Your heartbeat. Your embrace. This is what your baby craves.
Oh my sister, my friend. There will be moments, hours, even days or weeks when you cry a river of tears wondering how you will survive.
When the exhaustion is so overwhelming that you may think crazy dark thoughts.
In these times, take a deep breath.
Make yourself a cup of your favourite tea. Forget all the advice, the rules, the should haves, should nots, or should be’s… and just focus on your heartspace, your inner knowing, your LOVE for your baby. Know that you are doing the best you can.
That YOU ARE ENOUGH.
That in the morning the sun will rise, the birds will sing and you will find
your mama strength to go on. It is OK to feel whatever you are feeling.
It is OK to want to give up. It is also OK to ask for help. To find support on those days when you feel low.
Reach out to your tribe. Connect with other mothers. Find a mothers group, a
massage or yoga class, a park play date meet up, a Facebook chat for midnight
mums. Keep looking until you find that feeling of solidarity, that warm heartfelt
understanding that will remind you to smile and laugh again.
Keep searching until you find those people, those mama warrior sisters, those who have walked this path before you and who walk along with you now.
Find these special people, these angels disguised
as everyday mothers, who help you to really truly remember that YOU ARE ENOUGH.
From my mama heart to yours
This letter was published in Love Letters for New Mothers
Let’s talk today about my journey with BIRTH . And not just Birth, but life in all.
Every time I see a Birth and get to participate in one , I am so humbled and empowered
at the same time. For one, I know we can not control when and how our babies come.
But at the same time, we also are Empowered enough to make it the best transition possible. If we can understand that our body is one magical amazing system… And if we
can sync ourselves with it, then amazing things happen.
It all comes down to one practice: being present in your moment. I am sitting at the
moment after ordering breakfast. Instead of typing while attempting to eat, I put the
computer away and brought the food to me. I thought about every bite I was taking. It
makes me appreciate every moment. And my mind is not bombarded with a million
Birth is very much the same way. My last birth was a most amazing experience for me.
With each contraction, I closed my eyes and felt and embraced what my body was
feeling. I envisioned my cervix and uterus and my unborn child ready to make his
journey. With each contraction, I spoke to him and breathed a little deeper and gently
pushed a bit. Between contractions and during the time of rest and peace, I enjoyed the
complete and utter silence; taking in the Quiet and not thinking about anything. At other
times, I would envision my child also taking a break. Enjoying the dark and comfy home
he will only have for a few more moments.
I have never felt so in love with my body as I did during the birthing process. I
understood that this body I walked in every day, was complete perfection. Every thing
about it was made to sustain life and create it. That’s pretty amazing. I have changed my
body type so many times with each pregnancy, each bed rest, with years of breastfeeding
and pushing myself to get it all done. But I have never NOT loved what my body does for
me and this shell that I walk in. Because essentially, we are so much more than the outer
shell the world sees. Inside this shell, is an entire universe. And once you realize this, you
start being in tune with this universe inside of you. And you start smiling more. And
resting better when you close your eyes. And feel nourished as you eat something. Every
experience becomes what it was meant to be. Not just another thing completed on our too
long lists of daily tasks.
So think about what I have just shared with you. No matter where in your birthing
journey you are at the moment, it has been perfectly CREATED for you and by you. You
are also part of this CREATION. Enjoy it, nourish it. Just as you should enjoy YOU and
An Empowered Gentle Birth is that. Gentle because you are working with your body and
your every cell. Empowered because you are so connected with your being that you are
the MAKER of your days and you alone can choose how your ideal Birth will look like .
But at the same time, understand that if it not going as you wanted it to, or how you
planned it to go, then you are still enjoying one of the greatest gifts you have received and
that will still be a Gentle , Empowered Birth.
Thank you for allowing me to be part of YOUR journey as I assist and support you.
From inside my shell, I humbly thank you and Honor your Empowered and Gentle Birth
and will walk by your side as you become a BIRTHING Queen
It is March 2020 and Al Ain is looking her gentle, Spring best. Our living room window is open and while I cannot see them, I can hear the birds whistling. Our neighbours are cooking and the aroma of foreign spices drifts into our apartment. I’m sitting on the floor, with my daughter, Cara Bella. She is 11 months old and she is my oldest friend. There are blackberry stains on her t-shirt and one sock is off. I study her toes and the fluff between them. It’s a sign of a hard day’s work, playing and being cute! She is engrossed in the cartoons. I’m watching her watching them. I feel like the whole world has conspired to create this very moment. I think back to the years of waiting, the pain and unhappiness. I remember being told ‘no’, then I remember the ‘yes’. I study her eyelashes and the veins in her ears. I smile. In that very moment Cara Bella looks into my face, my heart and soul. She smiles a big, gummy, toothy smile. She is the queen of dribbles and drools. I nuzzle into her neck, she giggles, I smile and (with tears in my eyes) wonder if she will have to wait until she has a baby to know how deeply loved she is. I commit the moment to heart. Cara Bella moves off my lap. The moment is gone and yet, everlasting.
Becoming a mother is real. Like, reeeeeal!. The conception of, pregnancy with and birth of my daughter has stirred a profound calling in me. I feel like I am bursting with a newly-found energy that Cara Bella has brought with her. Women, through pregnancy, take their place in the annals of humanity. We stretch back and embrace women in caves from thousands of years ago. We connect. We share power, we acknowledge each other. We get strong.
Sadly, birth is now synonymous with fear and society tells us that it is unsafe. I want to strip that all away and return to the tools we have within ourselves to gently birth our babies. Through my work as a Hypnobirthing Coach, I want to empower women to realign themselves with the fact that birth can be positive, beautiful, calm and peaceful. There is a hypnobirthing toolbox full of tricks, tips and techniques that can help us arrive at this goal. Birth can be serene, magical and awesome. It has the unique ability to bring a woman back to herself, back to her strength and confidence.
Don’t be afraid, I am here to listen, support, guide, teach, encourage and journey with you. Through my Hypnobirthing sessions, mothers (and fathers) in waiting will gain the skills, knowledge and tools to have positive births that they can be proud of. I want to help the pregnant woman feel admiration for herself and in awe of what her incredible body can do. I want to help build the pregnant woman up and journey with her through this time of unique productivity. I want to help her synchronise her mind/body connection. The body achieves what the mind believes. That is the beauty of hypnobirthing.
The process of pregnancy is sacred, old, timeless. It is untouched by politics or climate change or social media. It is an evolutionary masterpiece. It is a series of interconnected miracles which take place in a woman’s body every single day she is with child. It is profound. No two births are the same. There are detours ahead. For example, Cara Bella came to us via IVF (ICSI), was born via emergency C Section and is formula fed. Not exactly how I planned or imagined but I can say with confidence that my pregnancy, delivery and feeding experiences with her have filled me with joy, pride and love.
We will plan for any and all detours. Don’t be afraid. The discomfort you feel as you birth your baby is something you can manage. I promise. Don’t be afraid. Let’s do it together!
I don’t share my whole birth stories with clients because I realized that birth stories mesmerize us to the point that we want what others are having. My intention with clients is to help them find their answers and be the sherpa in their journey.
I became involved in the birth world after the birth to my first son. Years later, I decided to heal from that challenging delivery through different techniques and was inspired to become a Birth story listener under the mentoring of Pam England, founder of the Birthing from Within Birth Movement. Since then, I have provided a safe space for parents to tell their stories surrounded by compassion and no judgment.
The call to become a doula was loud and very clear. I am certifying with Birthing From Within as a Mentor and Doula. I love to support parents in developing self-compassion and courage as part of their preparation for birth and parenting.
I’m also a mental health first aider and advocate. I work with my clients to prepare for their postpartum and parenting emotionally and physically and in efficient ways.
I would love to have the opportunity to support you in your journey and be with you and your partner along the way.
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